When you look at the title, you might have thought that,
winning is about, winning a position, money, respect, winning friends, winning
people, some tangible outcome, but what is it all about ‘winning ourselves’.
Let's try to understand it one by one.
What do we understand by interference? Is this something
which unnecessarily involves or meddles in our success? This could be the
general thought of interference.
How do we understand the meaning of interference with
regards to our growth and success? The interferences can be hurdles, which we come
across. Basically, there are two kinds of interferences- Internal and External.
Below are examples of internal and
external interferences (Self-discovery- CLF):
|
Internal
interferences: |
External
interferences: |
|
Ignorance |
Poor education |
|
Negligence |
Poverty |
|
Anxiety |
No guidance |
|
Stress |
Lack of family understanding and
support |
|
Lack of faith |
Political instability |
|
Grudges and jealousy |
Lack of finance |
The interferences make us much more awaken in the topics to
understand the world and ourselves in a new way.
How does 'ego' which is a very impactful interference, affect
us.
With ego, we lose touch with reality, and we miss
opportunities — to improve, to connect with others, and to achieve our goals.
“If the ego is the voice that tells us we're better than we really are, we can say ego inhibits
true success by preventing a direct and honest connection to the world around
us”.
To get over on the external interferences we should understand
our internal interferences well. And we can work on internal interferences completely,
as this is in our hands.
For example:
Lack of poverty, No Guidance or No Financial support, for
this external interferences we can fight and win by ourselves by building our
internal interference like Laziness, narrow-minded, Negative mind etc.
So instead of stopping ourselves with a belief and thought
of ‘no financial support’, we can think broadly and work hard and create
opportunities and make money and capability and erase this interference of
poverty in mind. We here learn how our internal interferences stop us from
growing if we don’t overcome it. And for that, firstly realization of our
internal weakness and threat is a must.
Ego plays a dual role in our life it has both positive and
negative impacts. This is a very important aspect to understand and ponder, the
term ‘ego’.
Example: Positive side- When ego says you are right, it
makes us believe ourselves and move forward to our success when on doubtful
step.
Negative side- When ego says ‘only I am right’, we may take the wrong step/decisions, and not consider the overall picture.
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| Image source: |
We are always
interdependent and connected with others:
Many a time we try to satisfy others from our outcomes. When
the outcome of our work will be dependent on another person’s opinion, that is
when we have stopped focusing on our aim but we are more into impressing others.
It is important to listen and understand others’ opinion and feelings, but at
the same time we need to be focused on what we actually want to achieve
Other aspects that help us in life to succeed can be being
positive about situations. We need to understand that everything can't be
perfect. We should give space for mistakes of ourselves and others. We should
learn to accept the flaws within us and others. We should learn to be adaptive
to situations which appear suddenly without prior notice
Everything around us won't be as we expect it to be. We
should change the attitude of blaming others for things that go against our
expectations. Confidence in oneself is good but it shouldn't turn into overconfidence.
When we become overconfident, we lose the ability to handle negative
situations. We always expect things to be perfect. We won’t be able to handle
failure. That is the extreme part of the ego, where we think our self to be right
in every situation
We make an opinion about ourselves to be perfect and don't wish
anyone to find mistakes in us. We become arrogant with people who have a different opinion. Our focus will only be on showcasing ourselves to be
perfect. When we become self-centred, slowly we lose out with the communication
with surrounding people, we become less connected.
What happens when we get disconnected? Example: We fail to
share our ideas in many instances and that might lead to external interference
like lack of funding for our ideas or something else.
Thus it's very important to be connected to people around us.
Not just to share our problems and ideas but also to understand their
feelings. In other words to activate our EI (Emotional intelligence).
These aspects bring us closer to a few important facets of our
character, Personal, Social and Religious values we inherit.
I will conclude by summarizing how can we deal with internal
interferences. The internal interferences are there in every one of us, nobody
is perfect. The action we can take is, first of all, understanding our
interferences and looking at ways to practically break them into units and see
how each unit is impacting in our day to day affairs (SWOT). And the next step
is accepting, wherever we need to improve upon. And further looking for ways to
polishing ourselves so that we come out of interferences one by one gradually.
And as we discussed above, once the internal interferences are in our control,
it will, directly and indirectly, influence our external interferences in the
effect that our external interferences can be controlled.
Further reading: Why “Ego is the Enemy,” and what we can do about it.
The above writing is organised from a group discussion transcript of ‘Self Discovery’ course (Day 4) of Credence Learning Foundation. For more information mail us at- reach.clf@gmail.com
I thank our Batch 2 members for this wonderful group discussion.
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