Behavior is just the tip of the iceberg. It's important to consider what's beneath the surface:

By,
Ray Mathis

It’s the 90% of an iceberg that’s below the surface that you need to be concerned about.

Behavior is just the tip of the iceberg. Too often, teachers and schools ignore what’s below the surface. It’s why attempts at behavior modification often don’t work, and things often just get worse.

Here’s how life unfolds: EVENT + THOUGHTS = FEELING > BEHAVIOR

Anything that happens is just an EVENT in our lives. Our brains are always generating THOUGHTS, trying to make sense of what happens, and watch for potential threats. It’s what we choose to think about EVENTS that really causes how we FEEL, and attitude is always the father of behavior. THOUGHTS simultaneously can give rise to emotion like anger, and MISTAKEN goals. Two common mistaken goals when angry are POWER and CONTROL, and REVENGE.

Many kids come to us with a history of troubling life EVENTS with adults in their lives. These EVENTS were quite threatening to them. The thoughts they generated in response were quite understandable, quite human.

Over time, their THOUGHTS, and the FEELINGS and BEHAVIOR they give rise to become “rutted” in their brains. This makes such THOUGHTS, FEELINGS and BEHAVIOR quite automatic. They are quick to REACT or even OVERREACT to anything we do that’s similar in any way to what’s happened to them in the past. An overreaction is often an age regression. It can make them behave quite stupidly, to act against their own self-interest.

Teachers bring their own cognitive, emotional and behavioral ruts to interactions with students. It often involves being quite authoritarian. That predisposes them to get angry, overreact, and behave in ways that remind troublesome students too much of adult from their pasts.

It’s important to keep in mind that behavior is just the tip of the iceberg. The more we can learn about what’s beneath the surface with troublesome kids, the better we can plan how to best intervene. Their FEELINGS and BEHAVIOR won’t change until the attitudes do.

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In addition, to better understand please click the below link to watch another video discussing similar topic.

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(The speaker in the video is not an author, he is another person)

(Author of this article Ray Mathis, is Education Consultant, Speaker, Educator, Author, Advocate for Mental and Emotional Tool Kit, Tool Time group leader).

Source: This post was shared by the author in a LinkedIn social media group.

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